PUNXSUTAWNEY PHIL PREDICTS: “SIX MORE YEARS AS WORLD CHAMPION FOR NONITO DONAIRE!”
At approximately 7:26 A.M. ET today, Punxsutawney Phil — the Seer of Seers, Prognosticator of all Prognosticators — emerged from his burrow at Gobbler’s Knob in Punxsutawney, Penn, and proclaimed, in his native Groundhogese, that the “Filipino Flash,” NONITO DONAIRE, would win the vacant WBO junior featherweight title when he rumbles with former world champion Wilfredo Vazquez, Jr., This Saturday! February 4, at the Alamodome in San Antonio, Texas!
The fight will be televised live on HBO World Championship Boxing, beginning at 10 p.m. ET / 7 p.m. PT!
“It‘s six more years as world champion for Nonito Donaire and his trainer Robert Garcia,” stated Phil as he shadowboxed during his annual news conference. “On Saturday night, boxing fans around the world will be chanting ‘Remember the Alamodome!’ because that is where Nonito will have won his fourth world title in as many different weight divisions.”
The world’s most famous forecaster, wearing a coonskin hat, and a T-shirt emblazoned with “100% PHILipino” on the front, and “Alamo City or Bust!” on the back, went on to predict that Donaire would win more world championship belts in higher weight divisions.
“It’s an election year and I’m supporting Donaire because he is a bipartisan world champion who is powerful with the right and the left!” exclaimed Phil.
Before returning to his burrow to watch episodes No. 1 and No. 2 of Peter Berg’s critically-acclaimed six-part series, “ON FREDDIE ROACH,” on HBO On Demand (episode No. 3 debuts Friday at 9:30 p.m. ET/PT, exclusively on HBO), Phil was pressed for a definitive answer on whether Vazquez had a chance to defeat Donaire, Phil astounded the media by answering in English.
Quoth the groundhog, “Nevermore.”
